#11 🤔Shidduch Blues😪

To be sung to the tune of The Pesach Blues by Abie Rottenberg

Don’t you love the parsha of shidduchim,

What a great time for boys and men,

But I happen to be a woman,

And it's that type of phone call again,

“I’ve got a real catch, a true gem!”

Says Mrs. Shadchan, convincing again.

“Why don’t you just give it a try?”

But all I wanna do is cry,

Chorus: “I’ve got the Sick of Shidduchim Blues,

Don’t think this is breaking news,

If this boy is 40 and I’m 23

How can he be good for me?

I’ve got the Sick of shidduchim blues

Sick of shidduchim blues.”

“In yeshiva, he’s one of a kind,

He’s a metzuyan, top of the line.

His middos are just perfect," I’m told

"Grab him! His heart’s made of gold.”

So reluctantly, I say, “Okay”

We have a date set up the next day.

Although inside, the butterflies are flying,

At least I can say I’m trying!

Chorus: I’ve got the, I’m in shidduchim blues,

A Jewish woman’s gotta pay her dues,

But my heart is poundin’

And ma brain feels numb,

Thinking about when he will come,

I’ve got the Sick of Shidduchim Blues, Sick of Shidduchim Blues!

Well, of course, it was DOA,

So to Mrs. Shadchan I do relay,

Exactly what I‘m looking for,

She needs to hear no more.

“I think I’ve got the perfect one for you,

He is nearly, 4’3 or 4’2,

As a former musician from Tzefat,

I think that you’ll like him a lot!”

Chorus: I’ve got the, Sick of Shidduchim Blues,

Will I ever have good news?

Now my heart is hurtin’ and my brain is numb,

Wondering if Prince Charming will come,

I’ve got the Sick of Shidduchim Blues, Sick of Shidduchim Blues!

The next day I am in a bad mood,

My apologies for bein’ so rude.

A Pesek Zman is now what I desire,

So my acne will be haywire!

And as I take that first big bite,

Ah, geshmak, a real delight!

I think that my phone I hear ringin’

Perhaps I should start singin’,

Chorus: “I’ve got the Sick of Shidduchim Blues

A Jewish woman’s gotta pay her dues,

Please don’t call with ideas or dumb advice,

I know that doesn’t sound too nice,

But I’m Sick of Shidduchim Blues, Sick of Shidduchim Blues!”

Now, the point of this song is not to kvetch,

About this challenge that was given to me,

I know that there is a master plan,

That one day, I’ll be privileged to see.

All I want is some understanding,

And validation, yes, that too,

If you happen to feel the same way,

Perhaps then, this song is for you!

Chorus: I’ve got the “Sick of Shidduchim Blues,

A Jewish woman’s gotta pay her dues,

But my heart is numb, and I feel worn out,

Even so, I still won’t pout,

I’ve got the I’m in Shidduchim Blues, I’m in Shidduchim Blues;)